Well, hi! I’m actually 24 weeks pregnant as of this weekend. Clearly, I’m behind on the every-two-weeks schedule I planned. We’ve had a full, weird month and I wanted to wait a little bit till I posted.
Since it’s not pregnancy-related, really, let’s recap the icky part up here. Weaning wrecked me. Mentally, I was prepared for it. My plan was to nurse C as long as she wanted. I knew she was getting increasingly frustrated by my decreased supply, so it wasn’t a total shock when she stopped about a month ago. She surprised me a little by just stopping one day and then never asking to nurse again, even when she was upset or sick or teething, but it didn’t feel like a huge deal. I did it for her, so when she was done, that was okay. (But also, how is she getting so big?)
But physically/emotionally… oof. I was prepared to feel a little down because that happened when we dropped a couple feedings in the winter. I was not prepared to feel a little down for a couple weeks, followed by catastrophically depressed for 7-10 days, followed by a little down for another week and a half. My brain was such a crappy place to be that I didn’t want to be left alone. I was so irritable that I didn’t want anyone around. I was a treat.
C was going through some sleep stuff for the worst of it, and it felt extra hard when I couldn’t soothe her because I had convinced myself I was a terrible mom. I have nothing against therapy, but I’ve never found a therapist I liked. Still, it felt worth going through the motions of having a therapist for a little bit because I felt so, so bad.
And then it stopped. About a week and a half ago, I woke up and didn’t have to give myself a ten-minute pep talk to get out of bed, or do chores, or leave the house. I didn’t feel nuts for deciding to have another baby when I was doing such a bad job managing having one… because I actually wasn’t doing a bad job with one. Everything was more fun, and hard things weren’t that big of a deal.
I thought when I read about post-weaning depression that surely it couldn’t just end so suddenly, but lots of people said that’s how it was for them. And that’s how it was for me.
Amidst all that, we got most of C’s big-girl room put together, saw some friends and family, and have been getting back into the swing of normal life with Jack home. I cooked dinner once in the three and a half weeks he was gone, thanks to my parents, so I’m doing that 5-6 nights a week now. He’s back to building her big-girl bed. And C is back to loving the ability to crash into his office and get midday hugs. C has been operating on a weird non-schedule that I’ll talk more about in the next few weeks, and I’m trying to roll with it. Basically, we’re doing really well and enjoying the heck out of our little family before it gets bigger.
Previous Updates
I’m Pregnant Again! + The First Trimester
Pregnancy #2: 15 + 16 Weeks Pregnant
Pregnancy #2: 17 + 18 Weeks Pregnant
At 23 weeks pregnant, baby boy was supposedly the length of an ear of corn.
SYMPTOMS
Sometimes I’m nauseated at night, but I only notice if C is up in the middle of the night. If I leave coffee sitting next to me too long after I drink it, the smell makes me feel sick.
Constipation is still very much a thing. Aloe water and senna haven’t been cutting it for me, so I’m still using Oxy-Powder. It’s not the most gentle thing in the world, but it works.
As I mentioned above, I have no more milk supply. C stopped nursing about a month ago and my supply was dropping way before that. I kept pumping a little bit after she stopped nursing to keep making frozen milk cubes for teething. When I was only producing half a milk cube per 30 minutes of pumping, I gave up.
I very frequently have something in my hand and go to set it down and it just flies out of my hand. Major pregnancy clumsiness.
My appetite is picking up and I’m hungry all the time. But I have to be mindful of eating too much, because I get extremely uncomfortable and borderline useless when I do. I am obviously happy to give this little boy all the time he needs to grow, but gosh, give me breastfeeding hunger over pregnancy hunger every single day of the week. After being a bottomless pit for almost a year and a half, I am not used to food making me feel so crappy.
Sciatica is so annoying. I often have to readjust when I’m sitting or bending over because it flares up so suddenly. And as great as sleep and rest are, they both seem to make it worse because being in one position for a long time isn’t good for it. The other night, Jack came up to bed and said I kept saying, “Ow, ow, ouch,” in my sleep. Rolling over is really uncomfy.
I’m sleeping hard and mostly well when C sleeps well. And it’s much harder for me to feel like a real person when she doesn’t.
I can’t believe I haven’t mentioned pregnancy rhinitis. I don’t remember when I got it with C, but I’ve had a slightly runny/stuffy nose pretty much this entire pregnancy. My nose also bleeds super easily. As do my gums. I’m due for a dentist appointment but flossing and sometimes brushing make my gums bleed, so that sounds very unpleasant.
I’ve developed a little bump for sure. I have one pair of denim shorts that still works and I hate all the maternity shorts I’ve found. You’ll usually find me stretching out that pair even more, or wearing a dress or athletic shorts. I’m about 10-11 pounds above my pre-pregnancy weight, which is almost exactly where I was at this point in my pregnancy with C.
Food
My diet has been boringly normal. Like when I was pregnant with C, I haven’t had any serious aversions, and I’m grateful for that. I kind of crave fruit and generally, junk food of all sorts sounds better than when I’m not pregnant. I also suddenly realized about 2.5 weeks ago that while water sounded disgusting, cold water sounded amazing. Normally, I’m a weirdo who prefers typically-cold beverages to be room temperature, but cold water is my favorite thing right now.
Exercise
I’m doing the first phase of this exercise program until my core can’t handle heavy lifts anymore. It’s one of my favorites and the workouts aren’t too long. The built-in mobility focus days are also really helpful. I’m playing with heavier lifting further into this pregnancy than I did with C, and hoping it helps me build a little muscle and consequently stay a little stronger/musclier into postpartum. I felt so skinny and weak for a long time after she was born. Maybe the 6 weeks of rest postpartum just do that. But I like lifting heavy wieghts, so I figure it’s an experiment worth running. The only cardio I did for most of my pregnancy with C was walking. Since we have the Peloton now, I usually do 1-2 rides a week.
I’ve been taking Willis and C on walks, too, and also just generally chasing C around and taking care of house- and yard-work.
Stories
We have another very active and strong baby on our hands so far. You can see him move from the outside pretty regularly. The owner of our Little Gym found out we were having a boy and was about to say something about how active little boys are, but then she looked at C playing in the lobby and said, “I wouldn’t say this to just anyone, but I think you already have the most active kid imaginable.” We adore our little busy bee and can’t wait to meet her brother.
